work + metal stress + pressure + OT= unhappiness.
I am obviously not happy. I perfectly know the reason for this unhappiness. And I just want to get this over and done with. I'm so frustrated and all of the things happening around me is becoming to much to bear. There were days that I want to cry and scream for all its worth. Just to let it all out. And it's so sad because I'm not like this. I'm far from the girl I used to be. Gone was the optimistic and always smiling girl who loves to laugh. Now I'm glued to my chair, forever looking at the monitor. Dreading that I might have done something wrong again. I am forever fearful of the things that has not happened yet. And it depresses me. It dampens my soul. I don't want to be a gloomy workaholic person. The more hours I stay at work the more I long to break free. It' not healthy! For the past days I've been feeling neck and shoulder pain. There were times that I felt that my surrounding was spinning. I have to close my eyes to steady myself.
Hay masama na talaga ito... God help me please????
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